I see this exact battle play out quite often in reality, but never so transparently as you express it here. The battle between one who believes they are entitled to act decisively upon their unchecked perceptions, and another who wants to obligate the first to a more charitable, patient mode of judgment.
Although I would place myself firmly within the latter camp, I can appreciate how you have represented the mentality of both sides brilliantly!
My only suggestion would be that you mark the two speakers, to make it more readily apparent that they are countering each other's perspective, while alternating stanzas. Any reader who is paying attention will figure this out, but during the short time it took me to notice, the appearance of a strong contradiction felt rather offputting.
This was electric,I loved how you staged intuition versus logic as a fierce poetic debate on truth and power.
Thanks for sharing!!
💖
Thanks for reading!
Your welcome!!
This is such a clean takedown of fake intuition masquerading as certainty
Thank you!
Wow
beautiful piece ❤️
Thank you 💖
This is truly excellent!!
I see this exact battle play out quite often in reality, but never so transparently as you express it here. The battle between one who believes they are entitled to act decisively upon their unchecked perceptions, and another who wants to obligate the first to a more charitable, patient mode of judgment.
Although I would place myself firmly within the latter camp, I can appreciate how you have represented the mentality of both sides brilliantly!
My only suggestion would be that you mark the two speakers, to make it more readily apparent that they are countering each other's perspective, while alternating stanzas. Any reader who is paying attention will figure this out, but during the short time it took me to notice, the appearance of a strong contradiction felt rather offputting.
Thank you!
This was electric,I loved how you staged intuition versus logic as a fierce poetic debate on truth and power.
Thanks for sharing!!
Thank you 💖